


Rightfully Wasted

by tinglingworld



Category: The X-Files
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Jealousy, a little humor, miscommunications
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-23
Updated: 2020-09-23
Packaged: 2021-03-07 23:22:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,762
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26615890
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tinglingworld/pseuds/tinglingworld
Summary: Mulder gets drunk off his ass thinking Scully cheated on him. She didn’t. Fluff and cuteness ensue when the misunderstanding is cleared up.
Relationships: Fox Mulder/Dana Scully
Comments: 4
Kudos: 65





	Rightfully Wasted

**Author's Note:**

> I should be writing something else and instead I wrote this. It’s silly but it’s kinda cute. I hope you can agree on that.

Mulder looked at the shot glass in front of him with a frown before reaching for it and downing it in one gulp, banging it back on the table empty.

“Another one!” He ordered, not looking up from the little dent in the table’s wooden surface his eyes had been fixed on for the past three shots. Or maybe it had been four now. Either way, his glass was filled up again and he didn’t even care who of his friends had done it. He simply pulled the glass closer and then downed the brownish liquid in another big gulp. He wasn’t even sure what he was drinking. He’d never been big on alcohol, rarely drank something other than beer. Hard liquor wasn’t his forte. But tonight he had needed it and he wasn’t going to complain about whatever it was the Gunmen kept pouring him.

Five, he thought this must’ve been five shots now.

When was he supposed to be feeling less shitty?

“It’s gonna be alright, mate!” Langly said, patting Mulder’s shoulder a couple of times.

“I really can’t believe she would do this,” Byers mused but was quickly shut up by Frohike’s elbow to his ribs.

“Don’t say that while he’s sitting here. We’re supposed to pick his side!”

“But I really don’t think Scully would-“

“Shut up, man!” Langly pitched in, turning around to his two friends and gesturing towards Mulder hunched over their kitchen table, “He’s just been cheated on, let the man drink away his feelings in peace.”

“And what would you know about getting cheated on? I don’t remember you ever having anyone who could-“

Frohike was cut off by an empty CD case being flung into his direction. It hit his upper arm and then shattered on the floor.

“Hey! That was uncalled for!”

“Stop wasting the cases, guys,” Byers moaned, leaning down to pick up the broken pieces of plastic when Mulder spoke up:

“SHUT UP! I just saw Scully kissing another guy and you’re- bickering”

All three gunmen looked at him with surprise before shame crept into their expressions.

“I’m sorry, man.” Frohike offered and stood up to sit at the table opposite Mulder. Byers followed him so they were all huddled around their messy kitchen table.

“It sucks. I’m sorry she did that to you,” he offered, reaching out to gently pat Mulder’s forearm.

“But you’ll be fine. Drink about it today and then move on tomorrow.”

Mulder huffed, playing around with the empty glass in his hand.

“As if I ever could.”

“Sure you can. You’ll find someone else, find the right woman for you.” Langly nodded along to support his own words.

“Maybe I should call her.”

“NO!”

All three gunmen had spoken simultaneously and Mulder was so rattled by the sudden volume that he sat up straight too fast and almost fell over backwards on the crappy folding chair. He caught his balance at the last moment and righted himself, holding on to the table’s edge.

“Damn it. I heard you,” he cursed, rubbing at his eyes. It wasn’t actually his eyes that were itching but he was too drunk from five shots on a mostly empty stomach to realize that the organ used for hearing were his ears.

“Sorry, Mulder, but you really shouldn’t call her,” Frohike said and the others nodded.

“Yeah, you gotta walk away,” Langly agreed.

Mulder stopped rubbing his face and leaned forward again, resting his heavy head against his forearms.

“Maybe I imagined it though,” he mumbled almost incomprehensibly into his own shirtsleeves.

“You said you saw it clearly though? Her kissing another guy at the restaurant? On the lips?”

“Hmpff.”

The noise was probably meant as an affirmation although it was hardly recognizable as such.

That was the story he’d told them when he’d come in a little over half an hour ago. Somewhere between raging and crying and asked for booze because “Scully’s kissing someone else. She’s cheating on me with someone else. I walked by her favorite restaurant by accident and it has big glass windows and there she was kissing someone else!”

“I should talk to her,” he now mumbled.

“You really shouldn’t. Not tonight anyway, you’re wasted. Rightfully so, but wasted nonetheless.”

“Go home, sleep it off,” Frohike offered.

“No! One more!”

The Gunmen exchanged glances. Another shot wasn’t a good idea but they weren’t going to argue with the man who just got cheated on, so Langly dutifully poured him another shot.

“Last one though,” he warned and Mulder hummed before picking up his glass once more and downing the liquor. His body shivered as the alcohol hit and he put his head back down on the table.

“You think he passed out?” Langly asked when Mulder hadn’t moved in a couple of minutes.

“I’m not carrying him anywhere. If he has, he’s sleeping right here at this table,” Frohike replied, leaning closer to Mulder.

“Not passed out,” the hump of man on the table mumbled.

“Great, then I’ll drive you home now. You really should sleep it off. It’ll be alright.”

Byers got up and already grabbed for his keys. It took all three of them after all to get Mulder into the car but eventually they had successfully deposited him onto his own couch at Hegal Place.

...

The consistent ring of her doorbell at 11.35pm had Scully hurrying towards her apartment door to stop the offending noise as quickly as possible.

“Alright, alright I’m coming! For god’s sake!”

She unlocked the door and pulled it open with a little more force than necessary only to be greeted by 6 feet of Mulder tumbling towards her and falling at her feet.

“Mulder?!”

For a moment she was too stunned to react but then her instincts kicked in and she kneeled down next to him.

“Mulder, I’m sorry, are you alright?” She ran a hand through his hair but then stopped to sniff the air around him, pulling at his shoulders to get his face off the floor.

“Are you- drunk?”

His head lifted slowly and very glazed over eyes tried their best at focusing on her, giving her the answer.

“Mulder, you’re wasted!”

“Rightfully so,” he slurred, remembering having heard that combination of words before today so it had to be appropriate, right?

“Well, I’d like to know about that,” Scully murmured and got to her feet,”Come on, get up off the floor. And please tell me you took a cab here?”

“Hmm I did.”

He was twice her weight and so much taller, it was an awkward act but eventually Mulder was on his feet and Scully hooked her arm securely around his waist and decisively steered him toward the kitchen table where he almost fell trying to seat his ass on a wooden chair.

Scully looked him over with both exasperation and worry as she filled a large glass with water. What in the world had him get this drunk? She wasn’t sure she’d ever seen him this inebriated. Tipsy, yes, speaking too loudly making horrible alien puns drunk, that too. But like this? She sat down next to him and pushed the glass toward him.

“Drink,” she prompted.

He eyed the glass carefully, his lower lip eventually coming out until he was pouting and his eyes looked almost like they were swimming with tears.

“Don’t want more alcohol,” he slurred, his voice matching his teary expression and Scully’s heart gave a tug watching him staring so sadly at the offending object.

“It’s water, Mulder,” she spoke softly, unable to resist the urge to brush a lock of brown hair from his forehead.

He unashamedly leaned into her touch and so she rested her palm against his cheek, caressing it with her thumb for a moment before retrieving it and pushing the glass closer to him again.

“Drink the water, it’ll help with the hangover tomorrow.”

His eyes dropped from her to the glass and eventually he reached up and diligently emptied it in long sips.

“I don’t feel too good,” he mumbled afterwards, resting his head on folded arms against the table.

“I can imagine,” Scully replied, “Why’d you drink so much? Where did you drink this much?”

“Gunmen,” came the murmured response from the heap of man looking more than a little pitiful on her kitchen table at quarter to midnight.

“They said- something about rightfully. Drinking. Cause- cause I got cheated on.” He paused and Scully looked at him questioningly, watching as he suddenly raised his head and focused as best he could on her.

“You!” He slurred, raising a hand to point a finger at her, misjudging their distance and poking her in the chest with it, “I’m angry with you! You cheated on me!”

His face fell, the sudden anger quickly replaced with that pout again, only now his lower lip was genuinely trembling.

“Why’d you do that, Scully?”

Scully’s own expression had morphed from questioning to incredulous.

“I didn’t cheat on you, Mulder, what are you talking about?”

He gestured wildly with his left hand, threatening to knock the empty glass off the table, until Scully caught his hand and held it firmly.

“You have that other guy though,” he whispered, gaze dropping to their clasped hands.

“There is no other guy. I don’t know what you’re talking about. What made you think I cheated on you?”

Scully was confused. Maybe she should’ve also been a little bit hurt that he’d just thrown that accusation at her but he was drunk and miserable and so obviously sad she just couldn’t find it in her.

“I saw you kiss him. The guy. Tall, black, those cool braids. Saw you at the restaurant.” His voice was so small, all Scully wanted to do was wrap him up in her arms. But his words eventually made sense as she realized what he must’ve witnessed and she couldn’t help the laugh bubbling up.

“Oh Mulder!”, she sighed then, squeezing his hand and bringing her other up to run it over his cheek again, making him meet her eyes.

“That was Gabriel. He’s an old friend from college I met for dinner while he’s in town. He’s also gay.”

Mulder stared at her in utter confusion, his drunk mind too sluggish to immediately process the information.

“But you kissed him. On the lips.”

“He kissed me hello, yes. He’s just a very affectionate guy. Mulder, I didn’t cheat on you. I promise.”

Scully rubbed her thumb over his cheek while Mulder kept staring at her. She wasn’t sure if he was actually looking at her or if he’d zoned out when he remained silent for a few long moments though.

“Mulder?” she questioned gently, weirdly enamored with his drunken self, despite herself.

The pout returned to his lips and this time when he blinked up at her under long lashes, his eyes actually filled with tears.

“I thought you cheated on me. I was so sad that I got drunk. Scully I’m so drunk, everything is moving.”

Seeing him like this, Scully suddenly felt awfully guilty. She knew it wasn’t her fault that Mulder had apparently walked by the restaurant at an unfortunate moment, but it tugged at her heart to see how much it had affected him.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, you thought that,” she apologized, brushing away the single tear that had made it down his cheek.

“You didn’t cheat on me?” he questioned, leaning his cheek into her palm.

She shook her head.

“So you still love me?”

She smiled at him widely.

“Yes, I do still love you. It’s taken us 7 years to get to this point, I’m not cheating on you three months into finally being with you.”

Scully watched the pout and sadness slowly disappear and instead a smile spread on his lips.

“You love me.”

“I do,” she laughed, brushing over his cheek once more before leaning in and pressing a short kiss to his lips.

He still had his eyes closed when she pulled back and he looked so ridiculously cute all drunk and -thankfully now- happy, she shook her head at herself. Of all the people in the world, this was the man she’d fallen for. She wouldn’t want to have it any other way.

She watched him watch her with a bright smile for another moment and then suddenly he sat up straight, reaching for her hands and tugging her towards him, though with the table’s edge in between them it meant he was currently dragging her more into that.

“Ouch. Mulder, what are you doing?”, she squealed.

“Wanna hold you,” he smiled and Scully’s heart skipped a little it was so full of love for him. So she got to her feet and then let herself be tugged into him until she was seated sideways in his lap and he’d wrapped his arms around her waist, resting his head against her chest. His breath came warm against her skin and she looped her arms around his neck, brushing her fingers through his hair, feeling the ridiculously silky strands glide through her fingers.

“I love you too, Scully,” he mumbled against her chest, “a lot. A lot a lot.”

Scully smiled.

“Did you really think I’d dump you by going around and kissing other guys in public?” She asked the tiniest bit amused, imagining Mulder’s drinking escapade at the Gunmen’s.

“Hmm,” he made indecisively, “No. Yes. Maybe. I don’t know. Please don’t kiss other guys anymore.”

“I won’t. Promise.”

“Hmm. Good.”

He nuzzled closer.

“How about we’ll get you into bed so you can sleep off that buzz?” She offered, never seizing her motions through his hair.

“Hmmm,” His hold around her waist tightened, “But I’m comfortable. And you’re warm. And I’m drunk.”

She chuckled and placed a kiss into his hair before pulling back to meet his eyes.

“Exactly why we should go to bed. Come on.”

She tried to get to her feet but his arms held her on his lap. With the best puppy look on his face he quietly said:

“I don’t wanna move.”

“Trust me, you don’t want to sleep at the kitchen table. And we can cuddle in bed, too. Come on.”

Scully leaned in to press another kiss to his lips and then quickly stood up, using his distraction as a means to escape his arms.

“Come, up with you. You’ll have a hell of a hangover tomorrow, don’t make it worse by sleeping on a wooden chair.”

She held her arms out to him and after a moment of processing their suddenly changed positions, he took hold of her hands and let himself be pulled up. Scully threaded her arm around his waist again and directed him towards the bedroom.

“You’re so tiny,” he said, looking down at her and patting her head with the hand he’d put on her shoulder.

She couldn’t help but laugh.

“Yes. I’m aware.”

She sat him down on the edge of the bed and looked him over carefully.

“Are you Okay to undress yourself?”

She wasn’t exactly sure how much motor function he had in his current state but he nodded decisively and so she left him to head for the bathroom to rinse off her face, give her teeth a quick brush and change into her pajamas. When she returned to the bedroom a few minutes later Mulder was indeed undressed to his boxers and undershirt and laid spread eagle in the middle of the bed, one leg hanging off the short end. Scully chuckled, picked up his clothes strewn around in a half circle on the ground and put them down on the chair in the corner before turning off the lights and climbing into bed next to him.

“Move!” She ordered, pushing at his spread out limbs until she was able to pull up the comforter and had at least half of the space for herself, earning a groan in the process. As soon as she’d settled in, Mulder’s limbs returned: an arm was thrown over her waist, fingers splaying out against her stomach as a leg wriggled it’s way between hers.

When she craned her neck to catch a glimpse of him, he was already fast asleep. Scully let the rush of love she felt for this silly man wash over her and snuggled into the pillow and his arms as she closed her eyes and dozed off. Her last thought was that she hoped he’d get to the bathroom in time when he’d inevitably wake to throw up later.


End file.
